My first-born son graduated from high school this past week. Insert deep breath.
To be honest, I wasn’t nearly as emotional as I had thought I would be. Perhaps it was the busyness, the joy of seeing long-time friends, or the fact that my past life came crashing into the present, but regardless, I found myself feeling immensely peaceful. In the days following, I have thought quite a bit about when our son was a baby, the seasons we’ve walked through. The loneliness I found in parenting alone. Hours in prayer over his destiny. Prayers that my son would become all God destined him to be. Tears as I begged for the restoration of my marriage when he was only a few years old. Anger when the pain seemed too heavy to carry. Regret when I wasn’t the mom that I wanted to be.
And yet, here today, my son stands before me a man. A young man, but a godly man, just the same. Graduating from high school with a plan for college. A worship leader. A thoughtful son, compassionate brother, generous boyfriend. He is a man of honor and integrity. Not perfect, but open to and pursuing being perfected by His creator. This mama heart is so very proud.
God has been so faithful. Time has not rushed by – I have earned every single year, tear, owie, bad decision, and breakthrough moment. My sweet boy will never again come and snuggle up in my lap, and I now hand him over to the world and the God who created it, trusting that He loves my baby more than I ever could dream.
And forever grateful for more blessings than I can count.