if only…

This morning was absolutely gorgeous – cool breeze, hot sun, light dancing off the lake below, cup of joe in hand. So fabulous! After a little while, I began to get really hot. For a split second I thought about stating my desire to have the deck facing another way so mornings like this could be spent in the shade. Thankfully, my desire to tame my tongue and be more grateful stopped the thought from escaping into my out loud voice. And, I was reminded of how sitting on my girlfriend’s deck one morning. I had stated how perfect it would be if only it was in the sun, as I was chilly. My fickleness can be so disheartening.

With all the conversations with my children about being grateful for what they have (children starving in Africa, little ones in Cambodia with no fresh water, babies dying on the desert floor…). And yet here I sit, daily I am quite certain, with a long list of “I wish’s,” never fully satisfied, completion just out of reach.

Today I choose to walk in fulness – embracing each and every moment – good and bad. Every breath is a gift, every step triumphant. When my 4-year-old screams in defiance, I will celebrate his independence. As my 8-year-old argues her position, I will honor her  passion while tenderly redirecting her presentation. I will climb mountains of laundry will gratefulness that I didn’t have to walk 5 miles to a river, and grin at my sun spots and cellulite as I marvel in the number of years God has graced me with.

It’s a beautiful morning.

 

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