ugly from the inside out

I recently started back at the gym on a regular basis. What others might see as a chore, for me it is truly my safe haven – no expectations from others, quiet space, phone off, and an opportunity to take care of my body. It’s lovely.

A few days ago, I was feeling particularly svelte. It seemed my pants were a TINY bit more comfy, a little more loose, and I was confident that some progress had been made. Upon reflection in my bathroom, mirror, however, I became particularly disheartened as my eyes did not confirm for me what my heart seemed to be communicating.

Ugh.

Change is an awkward thing, and subsequently, most people are not willing to do the work required to actually ever see much of it at all. Several weeks of thoughtful planning, careful execution and faithful diligence to a new routine,  schedule and diet plan didn’t seem to bring with it any sort of reward at all. On the outside, all appeared to have maintained the status quo.

Similarly, when we pursue mental or emotional, spiritual or relational health, it can seem as though all our efforts are met only with more to-do’s, more opportunities for failure (and subsequent guilt), with little to no reward (or praise!) from those around us.

Anyone feelin’ my pain?

The bible talks about going from glory to glory; from mountain top to mountain top. We keep moving forward, choosing to trust that eventually our new labors will bring reward. Setbacks are temporary if we keep pressing on. Like a seed in the ground, there is pressing, watering, breaking, rooting and eventually pushing upward towards the sun…only to continue require watering, deeper roots, constant nourishing…

Do not give up. Do not give in. Keep investing in that thing you long for in your heart. Don’t give up on your plans for yourself, for as you become a better version of you, others also are inspired and given permission to pursue their own destiny. And if you are feeling discouraged when your outside is slow to catch up, remember that the greatness that resides inside you is still there, even when you think you’re the only one who sees. One day, my friend. One day.

 

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